Amanda Hocking

Amanda's Blog Post

you may say that I’m a dreamer, but I’m not the only one

July 21st, 2010 by
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I added a widget for the Wisdom countdown. Apparently, it’s only 32 days away. Egads!

I’m working on some fun things for the release of that, and I will be asking for beta readers/editors soon. I’m not asking yet, so don’t offer yet, cause Wisdom isn’t quite ready for betas yet.

Last night, I had a super bizarre, sometime frightening dream. I had to hide under a bed to avoid getting shot at one point. What I remember clearly: The song “Purple Rain” played in the background the entire time, but like over the loudspeaker at a mall – very background noise. And Joseph Gorden-Levitt was there, helping me, I think.

So I blame the entire dream on Inception.

As a writer and a frequent-owner of very, very bizarre dreams, I often wonder if given the option to live entirely in a fantasy (i.e. a made up world in my mind or dreams or what have you), would I choose it?

That’s not say that I don’t love my friends or family or many parts of my real life. Most of them in fact. But if I could live in a place where I always control everything, where I can do anything, look fancy, frolic with unicorns and Heath Ledger, would I take it? Even if I knew it wasn’t real?

That’s a pretty fundamental question, though. Is real pain better than false happiness? Not that my life is pain pain, but it’s not perfect. Maybe that’s a better way of phrasing it – are real flaws better than false perfection?

Obviously, the correct answer is to choose reality vs. delusion. That’s the right thing. The moral thing. But the right thing is for me to exercise 30 minutes day and save at least 10% of my check, but I don’t do those either.

I can’t honestly say that I would pick the right thing in that situation. I’d like to spoiler alert at least three movies with Leonard DiCaprio – no, wait, I’ll make that four – to help support my hypothesis, but I can’t. I mean, I can. But I don’t want to “Rosebud is the sled” them all for you.

The point is – I’m an honest person. And I like anybody that tells the truth. I have more respect for people who come out and say they’re an asshole than people who pretend to be nice.

But I think if given the chance, I might choose to dream over real life. Even a bad dream. I hope that doesn’t make me a bad person. I’d like to think it makes me a dreamer, but it probably just means I’m lazy.

Probably, I’ll never be given the chance to find out.

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  • Added the widget! Oh, and I got the books today! Thanks so much!